Your 12 Most Embarrassing Sex Questions—Answered!

By on May 15, 2013
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Your 12 Most Embarrassing Sex Questions—Answered!
We have answers to the awkward pregnant sex questions that you might not be comfortable discussing with your doctor.
1, Is sex safe during pregnancy?

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Sure, sex during and after pregnancy is definitely a new frontier, but it doesn’t have to be alien territory! Unless a woman is experiencing certain medical problems, sexual activity is safe up until your water breaks.

2, Will the baby be able to feel us having sex?

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“Your baby is not neurologically capable of figuring out that you’re having sex and is well-cushioned by the amniotic fluid,” says Mary Jane Minkin, M.D., author of A Woman’s Guide to Sexual Health (Yale University Press, 2004).

“If you feel well enough to have sex and are having a normal pregnancy, enjoy!”

3, What are some safe sex positions for pregnant women?

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The old standby missionary position for intercourse might not work for you now. But, there’s no time like the present to try a few things you haven’t tried before.

Try “girl-on-top” in a seated (facing him) position. Try hands-and-knees, spooning, side lying or any position that involves rear-entry. (And no, we’re not talking about that kind of rear entry!)

4, Can I still receive oral sex?

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Yes, for the most part, oral sex is also safe during pregnancy. However, if you receive oral sex, make sure that your partner doesn’t blow air into your vagina.

Since pregnant women’s blood vessels are more dilated, getting an air embolism (air in the bloodstream) could be a theoretical concern. (But, who does that?)

5, Are vibrators safe during pregnancy?

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This is a question that a lot of pregnant ladies are afraid to ask. The answer is, yes, vibrators are safe to use during a healthy, low-risk pregnancy. The vibrations will not hurt the baby!

Just make sure you keep your vibrator clean (during pregnancy or not). After every use, wash the surface with warm water and a gentle soap.

6, Will having sex bring on labor?

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“We still aren’t sure if intercourse triggers labor,” says Sean S. Daneshmand, M.D., clinic director of maternal-fetal medicine at the San Diego Perinatal Center at Sharp Mary Birch Hospital for Women.

“We know certain aspects of sex—nipple stimulation, orgasm, male ejaculation—cause contractions,” he adds. “We just don’t know if those contractions are strong enough to stimulate actual labor.”

7, Why are orgasms often more intense during pregnancy?

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Your entire genital and pelvic regions, including your uterus, are more engorged with blood, and the vaginal area becomes more sensitive.

Any kind of stimulation can often be enough to push an “engorged” preggo over the edge.

8, Is it normal to want sex all the time during the middle of pregnancy?

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Yes, that’s totally normal!

The second trimester is frequently the best one for sex. You’re no longer as exhausted and queasy as you were in the first trimester and you’re not as huge and uncomfortable as you will be in the third trimester.

9, Will sex hurt after I have the baby?

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“It takes at least three to six months for your genitals to get back to normal,” says Laura Berman, Ph.D., director of the Berman Center in Chicago and co-author of For Women Only (Henry Holt & Co.).

Instead of jumping back into doing the deed, think creatively: For instance, start with oral sex, then move on to intercourse once you’re comfortable. Don’t rush it; things will eventually get back to normal!

10, I’m worried my husband won’t be attracted to me after he watches our baby’s birth.

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This is an important conversation to have with your husband or partner before you find yourself in the delivery room! The truth is, while we may want our partner to be enamored by the thought of seeing a baby emerge from our birth canal, not every man is capable of handling this sight.

Give your partner the freedom to make his own decision, and stick by it; don’t ever make him feel bad about his choice.

11, I had my baby six months ago and now, when I have sex, milk sprays out of my breasts. Is that normal?

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Yes, as awkward as it might be. This is totally normal! If you are breastfeeding, you might squirt milk when you orgasm.

If this makes you uncomfortable, you can leave on your nursing bra or put a towel over your chest. You can also try breastfeeding or pumping before sex, but other than that there really isn’t a whole lot you can do about it.

12, Would it be terrible for my husband and me to have sex while the baby is asleep in her crib in our room?

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No. Definitely not!

The fact is babies (especially newborns) can sleep through anything, including the sounds of sex. But if the idea bothers you, experiment with having sex in other places in your home (kitchen, bathroom, closet, etc.).

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